How did I get here? On this site I mean, blogging about my boring life? Well, I have noticed some interesting and disturbing things about myself and decided to try to sort them out...
1. When in crisis I am unable to keep my mouth shut which comes in handy when I'm drinking wine and venting to my mom and my best friend but loses it's usefullness when I decide to forgive the person who has wronged me-and my loved ones still want to kill the ex-boyfriend, ex-husband, boss, etc...
2. I have a major personality trait (flaw) that allows me to easily forgive and forget and truly let it go. Not only does this create a problem for me; as leeches, losers and cheaters seem to meander in and out of my life at their leisure, but as mentioned in number 1...my loved ones do not share this trait and strongly disaprove when anyone who has wronged me gets a second chance. So far my ability to forgive has not had much success, but I'm not willing to give it up. When i try to hold on to bad feelings, it only makes me feel worse!
So this is how I arrived here...I have decided to limit what I tell my loved ones (yikes) and instead attempt to blog about my life in the hopes that when I decide to give someone a second chance...no one will know what an idiot they have been before, except me...and anyone who happens on this blog!
I started this blog today because tomorrow I am seeing the last man who broke my heart...it has been 5 months. I have told very few people that we have been in contact and those I told strongly disapproved...does he get a second chance...does he want one? As we were making plans via text messages, we decided on tomorrow evening...his preference, as my schedule is free...then it was bumped to afternoon because he is going bike riding tomorrow evening...am I being pushed to the back burner before the fire has even been (re)lit? Why would he have initiated contact if he didn't want to try again? If he wanted to try again, why is his profile back up on Match.com? Will any of these questions be answered tomorrow...I hope so!
Metals and Health
3 weeks ago
Wow! Sounds like a blog is a great too for you right now. But forgiving and forgetting is a good thing, not a bad one. At least in my opinion. Although no one wants to keep letting the wrong people into their life. Good luck.
ReplyDeleteI think you'll do just fine , in Life as well as in blogging.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the "well wishes"...I agree that forgiving and forgeting is a good thing...I couldn't live any other way! Too bad my friends and family are such grudge holders...lol!
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